editorialgirl

I opened my Yahoo Mail spam folder today, for the first time. The subject lines read as follows:

Go a potatoes
With be chunky
His populism by sadist
A successive a renal
Of redhead be cause
Condiment
Her my triton
His watchdog to cantilever
In magician no fenugreek
Be the countdown

Maybe I should submit it to the National Poetry Competition. I used to go out with a poet (yeah, a proper one, not some angsty teenager – this one was published and everything) and I’m sure this makes just as much sense as one of his pieces.

Some of my favourites are the ones which teach me new words.

“Have vicious my crowberry“
Ever heard of a crowberry? I hadn’t. Whether they are vicious or not would depend on whether you ate too many, I suppose.

“He puddingstone in catchword“
Puddingstone is a type of rock which looks a bit like Christmas pudding. Who knew? It is quite a catchy word though, I’ll give them that.

“That pooh go Rutgers”
Rutgers is a university in New Jersey. Well well well. Do poohs go there? We may never know.

Got an email from a manager at work today. “Please find attached a map…”, it said, so I was a bit confused to see that the only attachment was an Excel spreadsheet.

All became clear when I opened it:

Genius.

There are so many questions that this makes me ask. Why not use one of the many map websites that are freely available on the internet? Maybe he’s not very web savvy. So why not use, say, Paint? Why not scan a printed map? Why … just why??